Who’s watching the news?

I’m not really sure, but they must be a bunch of old fuckers, based on the sponsors of tonight’s NBC (first group) and ABC (second group) network newscasts.

  • Ford Taurus
  • Omnaris Nasal Spray
  • Olay Body Wash
  • Total Cereal
  • Toviaz – for over-active bladders
  • Imodium – for diarrhea
  • Dr. Scholls – for tired old feet
  • Advair – asthma and emphysema
  • Spiriva – asthma and emphysema
  • Lanacane – itch cream
  • Olay Pro X – wrinkle cream
  • Miralax – laxative
  • Zyrtec – allergy medicine
  • Ford Taurus
  • Crestor – cholesterol
  • Ford Taurus
  • Toviaz – over-active bladder
  • Friskies Cat Food
  • ThermaCare – heat wraps
  • One-A-Day 50+ for men
  • Omnaris – nasal spray
  • Levitra – erectile dysfunction
  • Dove Moisturizer
  • Plavix – poor leg circulation

Is that the most depressing list you have ever seen? Could there be one living soul under the age of 60 watching these newscasts? Is network news in trouble? May-be.